Victims of Anti-Crime

Some people go away on vacation and come home to find their home has been vandalized, robbed, or even destroyed. Those people have it easy.

We returned home from the airport and piled the suitcases by the front door, children staggering sleepily up the stairs or sitting dazed on the bottom step, until a passing Daddy can carry them off to bed. We started the standard triage process on the accumulated mail, and then discovered we were the victims of a heinous anti-crime.

Luggage for seven
Thirteen checked pieces plus eight carry-on bags makes quite a pile for tomorrow!

Anti-crime has never really caught on. I first read about it in a Terry Pratchett book, or perhaps it was Douglas Adams — whoever it was, he gave a few examples:

  • Breaking and decorating — the victim’s home is violated with new furniture, wallpaper, artwork, or whatever.
  • Whitemailing — the victim (usually a mob boss or other unsavory character) is extorted under threat that his good deeds will be revealed to his fellow criminals

Apparently the point of anti-crime is not just that a good deed be done, but rather that it be done in a way to produce maximum outrage or humiliation in the heart of the victim.

In any case, the ‘criminals’ used a variant of ‘breaking and decorating’ on us, and replaced our old, unattractive and barely-operable sinks with new, shiny sinks and faucets, leaving their jeering placards behind as evidence. As soon as we find out who it was, we’ll retaliate in kind, perhaps whitemailing them mercilessly … :)

New sink and cool faucet
Kathy has long wanted a better faucet, especially since our old one had been making ominous screeching noises when we turned it on and off.

In any case, it is good to be home.

They even hit the bathroom!
Even the little red bathroom was not deemed sacrosanct. You can imagine our outrage!

Tim (Kathy was too tired to write, and is, even now, nearly asleep in Cream Puff)

Project 365, Day 184

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7 thoughts on “Victims of Anti-Crime”

  1. I’m sure we will find a way to “pay back” these do-gooders. Like maybe drop a few (say 5) rowdy children by their house for a good, long visit. That should settle the score a bit. :)

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