Category Archives: College

Sarah Goes to College

When we first moved to this house in Lakewood, Sarah was two years old. I remember her curling up on one of the empty shelves on a bookshelf as we were moving in — a little nook just her size. Now she is 18, and my youngest daughter lives in a dormitory at a college some 2000 miles away.

Sarah always loved finding little 'nooks' in which to relax while we moved from the Duckabush to the 'big city'.

Sarah always loved finding little ‘nooks’ in which to relax while we moved from the Duckabush to the ‘big city’.

As the ‘baby’ of the family, Sarah has had ample opportunity to watch her older siblings leave the nest, and has grown in grace and in maturity far beyond her years. Just seventeen months younger than her brother Dave, she has always been his special ‘buddy’, but has also worked hard to forge and maintain deeper relationships with each of her brothers and with her sister. Like many teenagers, she has the capacity to sleep past noon. She loves coffee and creates colorful beauty wherever she goes. She fills our house with snarky comments, laughter, joy and singing. She listens to us carefully with a teachable spirit, while still not missing a chance to quote us in our silliness, like the time Kathy told me, “Tim, you’re the worst!” I can’t decide which I’ll miss most: the piano playing and singing, or perhaps the teasing and clever wit, now that she is away at school.


Sarah chose Union University, a Baptist-affiliated Christian college in West Tennessee. She received a generous scholarship, and has been working hard to raise the additional money needed to cover tuition, books, room and board. On Friday, we moved her into her tiny dorm room, and attended ‘crying chapel’ with her as we committed her as a young adult into the hands of God. We are so excited for her, and look forward with great joy to see what God will do in her and through her in these next years.


Rachel and Tim were able to join us in celebrating Sarah, driving 7 hours from Louisiana, and Daniel and David (who live there in Jackson, TN) were also very present in shopping and assembling dorm furniture, carrying suitcases, and generally making much of Sarah’s first day on campus. It seemed right and fitting, since Sarah has been there for many of her older siblings, as they have launched into their college years. Even cousin Rebecca and dear friends Karis and Jeremiah were able to join in the fun.


It was especially sweet to gather in Sarah’s dorm room on Saturday night to pray for her and to say our goodbyes. We were supposed to have left campus on Friday, but gave ourselves an extra day since we live so far away. I’m sure she was both grieved and relieved to have us finally depart.



Sarah is a deeply compassionate person, loyal and kind. She is also an excellent student, and very bright. I’m not very worried about her doing well in college because of the solid patterns of study and excellence she has laid down for herself as a home-schooler and in the Running Start program at a local community college. But she is also sometimes reserved and can take time to form deep friendships, so we are praying especially for her relationships with her roommates and classmates. She chose to join the Honors program, and we have high hopes that the Honors community will welcome and befriend her, in addition to the friends she makes through other classes and activities.

It is hard to believe Sarah is not my 'little muffin' anymore.

It is hard to believe Sarah is not my ‘little muffin’ anymore.

We are so proud of Sarah, and honor the godly young woman she has become. As she reinvents herself in these formative college years, we are confident that she will remain rooted in the tradition and legacy of our family and of the family of our God. Maybe she’ll call her old ‘Pa’ sometime this week and laughingly quote, “Dad, you’re the worst!”


Share or follow

Related posts:

When Family Meets Family

[Guest Blogger - College Sophomore, Rachel]

I had been talking about my family for weeks. They were coming to Jackson for Josh’s wedding which was going to be held a few minutes away from Union. I had to appropriately prep my friends for their arrival, so I passed around pictures, recited names and ages, and frantically waved my hands in excitement at any mention of parents or siblings. My friends soon learned my siblings’ names and their stories; they even knew the names of our two cats. (Who would not be present at the wedding, but were important nonetheless.)

In turn I couldn’t wait to introduce my family to all my friends attending the wedding and to show them Union, my home away from home.

Our first photo as friends!

Our first photo as friends!

In the weeks leading up to winter break, my roommate Karis and I discussed our post final/pre wedding plans. Her parents had generously volunteered to let me stay with them until I was able to move into the hotel with my family. It was so hard to believe that my best friend in college had never met my family. We had already been through so much together; it felt like we had known each other for most of our lives.

Trips with this girl are my favorite

Trips with this girl are my favorite

I got off the phone the night of the 13th, the night before my mom, Michelle (her bff), and Mamie were to arrive. “Was that mom?” Karis asked, sticking her head out of her room curiously. I loved that she was already accepting my family as hers.

I already adored her family after spending Spring break with them last semester, so of course I was thrilled for her to finally meet mine.

The second Karis got off of work, she rushed over to where my three “parents” and I were waiting. The first moments were filled with “hellos” and hugs and wide grins. The five of us then waltzed off to dinner where Karis made a hilarious first impression. We all laughed so hard I think they considered asking us to leave. A successful first night indeed!



(A few days later of course I also dragged my three jet lagged siblings out of their beds to meet her, but that’s a story for another day.)

Family! (Only missing Michelle)

Family! (Only missing Michelle)

Union has become my home away from home, and those there have become my family. I am so very grateful.

College is hard, and having someone alongside you to grow with is vital. Karis, thank you for being my roommate, thank you for standing beside me, for growing with me, and for being someone I can tell everything to. Thank you for understanding how much I love to yell, thank you for encouraging me, and thank you for always laughing at my jokes. Thank you for being forgiving and kind, thank you for accepting me for who I am, but still pushing me to be better. Thank you for being my best friend.
P.S. (I still love you more than coffee.)


Project 365 – Day 348 (Dec 14)

Share or follow

Related posts:

Eggs and the Navy

Today, Joshua received a call from a Navy Lieutenant (an O-3, equivalent to an Army Captain). “So, we haven’t heard from you about the four-year Navy ROTC scholarship we offered to you. Will you be accepting it, or should we offer it to someone else?”

In recent days, Joshua’s sense of God’s purpose for his college years has solidified into a near-certainty: it seems evident that the full-ride scholarship at Union University is the best path being offered. Joshua really likes the school, admires the faculty, is sold on the honors program, and even found a good church (while visiting last month). Best of all, his cousin Rebecca attends Union — the two of them really seem to enjoy each other.

So Joshua thanked the Lieutenant, and respectfully declined the scholarship the Navy had offered. It is odd, I think, to see a door close that was once hoped-for so passionately. I remember Joshua’s jubilation at receiving the scholarship, and the relief we all felt, knowing that there was at least one way for him to attend college. Now we hope that it will be the source of jubilation for another deserving young man.

Our hopes for a culinary scholarship were dashed early-on, although Joshua can cook one dish: scrambled eggs.

There is a powerful sense of belonging that military service provides, and for many years, we have all assumed that Joshua would pursue military service in exchange for college funding. His enjoyment of his Junior ROTC unit during High School, his personality, and his physical bearing have all contributed to that assumption. Yet now that Union has offered an academic, full-ride scholarship, ROTC is no longer necessary to underwrite Joshua’s college education.

It will be interesting to see what he does. Union has a cross-town relationship with another nearby ROTC detachment, and it might be rewarding for Joshua to join the unit. I worry that he might bite off more than he can chew, with the Honors program, maybe some difficult Physics classes, and the minimum 3.25 GPA requirement that comes with his scholarship.

We had a nice discussion about it today — I often feel very honored when Joshua talks with me about the big decisions in his life. As we agreed last night, it isn’t all about Joshua, but rather about God. How will God be most glorified?

The father of a righteous man has great joy; he who has a wise son delights in him. — Proverbs 23:24


Share or follow

Related posts:

A Starving College Student

When I was a Freshman in college, I was required to buy the 19-meal plan (per week). As I recall, it was between $700 and $900 per semester, and seemed rather pricey at the time. I lived in a dormitory just a hundred yards down the hill from ‘The Caf’, as we called it. I wasn’t there for many breakfasts, but it was nice to have an all-you-can-eat option at lunch and supper time.

I remember we ate (in addition to Caf food) a lot of cardboardy dollar pizzas, drank Grape Nehi sodas out of the vending machine for 35 cents apiece, at that time i desired they had a variety like the one they have in Melbourne (Looking for vending machine hire melbourne? You should contact Royal vending for snacks and drinks service). Then would drive to Hardee’s just before midnight. Hardee’s served milkshakes until 12 am, but they wouldn’t serve our favorite Steak & Egg Biscuits until after midnight, no matter how we cajoled them. So we’d drive two miles to the nearest Hardees at 11:50, order our milkshakes, and then stand around the lobby sipping our milkshakes until 12:01, when we’d order our biscuits.

Grape Nehi -- the nectar of my freshman year

In later years, I cooked for myself. My sophomore year, I learned to live on mashed potatoes, generic cornflakes, biscuits and macaroni & cheese. It was at that time that I firmly determined in my heart to choose a lifestyle in which I could earn enough money for decent food, or at least an occasional meat dish.

It was also at that time that I developed the ‘Little Debby Standard’, similar to the Gold or Silver standards on which currencies were at one time based. (These days, I think our currency is backed by the ‘Plastic Standard’, but that is another topic.) Anyway, the Little Debby Standard is the measure by which all grocery purchases are compared and judged, even now, some thirty years later. When purchasing a box of cereal for $3.00, I ask myself this question: “Is this box of cereal worth two boxes of Little Debby Nutty Bars?” Most of the time, the answer is a resounding ‘No!’.

My senior year, I shared a house with three or four others, and cooked a fair bit in the kitchen.

When I was a student, Mac & Cheese could still be found at the rate of four boxes for a dollar, and Campbell soups were never more than 50 cents (33 cents on sale). Ramen Noodles (by the case, of course) were less than ten cents apiece, and Little Debby snack cakes were 99 cents a box (or in rare cases, $.79 on sale). I miss those days, but am comforted by the fact that food prices have been fairly inflation-resistant, at least when compared to gasoline.

Student well-being is a big factor in the modern teaching space. Student seating but classroom chairs in particular need to not only be functional but promote a sense of well-being for the students in order for them to learn to the best of their ability. In the 21st century a significant opportunity exists for maximizing learning opportunities and creating meaningful spaces by rethinking the design of the learning space. This can begin with the chairs in which students sit can Check Classroom Chairs by click on

Basic sustenance for a college student

As Joshua prepares his heart and mind to attend college in the Fall, we are starting to think of what he will need to succeed. Assuming a 16-week semester, and meal plan options that offer ten or fifteen meals a week respectively, Joshua will probably need to learn to buy groceries and (at some level) prepare them for himself. We have hopes of teaching him to bake Kathy’s family’s famous Mesa Manna before he heads off to school. We’re mulling over the possibility of teaching him to make a basic tomato-based stew in a crock pot, should he venture so far into the field of culinary arts. But at the very least, he needs to know how to shop for the basic necessities of life without bankrupting himself. Hence the Little Debby Standard.

Nothing makes you hungry quite like Calculus.

Today, I took Joshua to shop with me at WinCo, a defiantly non-union grocery store in our area with decent prices. We spent the better part of 90 minutes shopping for food that a college student might need as a supplementary to a meal plan. It was fun for me to relive some of those hours of bewilderment that I spent as a single man in the aisles of the grocery store.

In retrospect, I realize how clever my Mom was. She used to take me with her to the Commissary, under the pretense of not wanting to drive. Now I realize that she was stealthily and kindly teaching me the value of my dollar when food shopping. I’m not sure this excursion was much fun for Joshua, though. He really hates shopping, and was a little panicky and wild-eyed toward the end. But I hope I managed to teach these basic principles:

  • Start by buying and eating the cheapest food item in each category, and work up from there. If you can stand the generic brand, great, you’ve saved yourself all that needless marketing and packaging cost. If not, then you’ll appreciate the name-brand version all the more, or you can decide (according to the Little Debby Standard) to go without altogether.
  • Avoid purchasing meats, fruits or vegetables. That is why you buy at least a partial meal plan — to avoid the expense, hassle and spoilage of preparing and presenting meats and vegetables. Let them worry about your roasts and salads and (if possible) grab fruit on the way out of the cafeteria for late-night snacks.
  • Wherever possible, buy food that doesn’t require refrigeration or freezing. If (as we expect) Joshua will be sharing a common living area, kitchen and refrigerator with three other young men, room in the freezer and fridge may be at a premium, at least on occasion. Pragmatically, food that can be stored in your room is less likely to be filched by others than that left invitingly in a common fridge.
  • Although food packaged in larger quantities may seem cheaper, if it spoils or is wasted, it isn’t cheaper, after all. When cooking and eating as a single man, economies of scale are hard to come by, unless you enjoy feeding your entire dormitory. (Amusingly, every time I tried to demonstrate this principle, the smaller packages were the same price or cheaper, on a unit basis. Sometimes the grocery stores just don’t cooperate.)

It turns out that a key food item for Joshua is peanut butter, which slightly surprised me.

In the end, we spent about $100 for what looked to be about two weeks’ worth of supplementary groceries, assuming a 15-meals-a-week meal plan. I had Joshua watch the prices, and keep the receipt — then we talked through it all with Kathy when we got home. As one much more nutrition-oriented, she had some important insights, but seemed to generally approve our excursion, if not necessarily our choices.

It will be interesting to see how Joshua copes with living on his own. Maybe he can persuade his cousin, Rebecca to cook for him … ?

What about you? What are your memories of college food? What advice would you offer to Joshua, as he heads off to school?

Share or follow

Related posts: