Tennis, Anyone?

One of the really nice things about living in Washington is that Spring can come pretty early. While folks in the East and Midwest dig themselves out from under another snowstorm, we sometimes enjoy sunshine and temperatures in the 50′s or even 60′s.

And of course, when the weather turns to Spring, a young man’s heart turns toward … tennis.

David the Tennis Pro stands ready

David the Tennis Pro stands ready

A few years ago, I introduced the kids to tennis — at the time we had a membership to a local pool that included a tennis court, and I thought it might make a nice change from swimming (since I swim like an elderly, crippled walrus). Although Joshua likes to play, he rudely took himself off to college, and almost never plays with us anymore. Daniel and Rachel didn’t really ‘take’ to tennis, but Sarah and David really seem to enjoy it.

David is a pretty good player, and he likes to get me out on the court and run me around for an hour or so. If he can get me sufficiently tired and thirsty, I’ll stop at 7-Eleven on the way home, so it is a win/win from his perspective — entertainment AND refreshment, all in one outing.

Don't let the innocent expression fool you -- this kid wields a diabolical raquet.

Don’t let the innocent expression fool you — this kid wields a diabolical racquet.

Some tennis players stand on the baseline and rely on speed and control, but I’m more of a sneaky-drop-shot kind of guy, and David reciprocates by slicing the ball as much as he can. Failing that, he lures me to the net, where I’m sure to make a fool of myself.

Of course, most of the time, Spring equals Rain in our part of the world. But this doesn’t seem to disconcert my Washington-bred kids — they have no problem standing around in the rain, as if it is perfectly normal behavior. I guess once you’ve swum the icy waters of the glacier-fed Duckabush River, you can empathize with Eponine from Les Miserables: “A little fall of rain can hardly hurt you now”. Whenever we see an umbrella (in a movie, or sometimes at church) the kids make a big deal of asking about it:

“Why is that lady carrying a portable roof?” they ask.

“It is called an Umbrella,” I explain, patiently. “People use them because they think the umbrella will protect them from evil spirits in the raindrops.”

I don’t think anyone ever claimed that Pacific Northwest humor was particularly funny.

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11 thoughts on “Tennis, Anyone?”

  1. Hahahha! Thanks Daddy for writing this blog! Tennis is AWESOME!! A little fall of rain will NEVER hurt me!

  2. Well maybe if you hadn’t been so darn encouraging when I was applying for scholarships, this wouldn’t have happened, and I’d still be around to play tennis. But no. “Think about your future,” you said. “Follow where the Lord leads,” you said. You’ve brought this on yourself; I’m not to blame.

    1. I don’t remember saying ANY of those things — they don’t sound like me, you have to admit. They are probably examples of your revisionist history — “As my old Pappy used to say … ”

      More likely, I said something like this: “Let’s go get a Slurpee. You can worry about your future later.”

      1. Admittedly I am, on occasion, a little cavalier with the more minute details regarding some of your word choices, but that in itself is no reason to doubt their objective validity. If I ever were to go so far as to actually CHANGE something you said to something you didn’t say, it would only be to make the statement more consistent with your overarching character.

        1. Huh. I’ll bet that’s your approach with scripture, too.

          But isn’t there a problem with your underlying assumption? You seem to think (against all experience and logic) that my overarching character (such that it is) is in any way consistent.

          I think I can argue rather convincingly that it is impossible for you to make a statement more consistent with my overarching character, when my overarching character is inconsistent in its very essence.

          What DO they teach them in these schools?

          P.S. My character is actually concave, so it doesn’t arch at all. It is more of an over-sagging character. As your ole grand-pappy used to say, Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc.

  3. Hahahaha I burst out laughing multiple times!! What gave me chuckles was that most of that is true :D haha thank you!!

    1. Most? Are you suggesting that your dear ‘ole Pa would prevaricate in any way? I’m shocked, really.

      OK, I admit, most elderly, crippled walruses swim a LOT better than I do. :)

  4. Ok, I really think you guys need to work on your blogging. These “comments” are way more entertaining. :)

    1. I’m supposed to be doing at least one blog every week. I’m behind the times … and it is one of the best ways to get Joshua’s attention (in a snarky way). :)

      Thanks for reading, Becca!

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