Date Night Fun

Date Night Choices:

1) Dinner and a movie out
2) DVD and popcorn at home
3) Theater tickets
4) Romantic walk through the park
5) Budget discussion complete w/Excel Spreadsheets

Oooo, ooo, raising hand for number five! I mean, it’s got everything.

  • Intrigue – What was this bill for again?
  • Romance – Ah, honey look, it’s the charge for my Valentine’s Day present
  • Comedy – How much money do we need each month? What a bunch of kidders!
  • Action – If we move the money around here and squeeze tight there we might be able to pay this bill.
  • Drama – Will the family survive the stresses and struggles of these financial difficulties? (insert emotional soundtrack here)

And so on. So really, two hours spent going over high finances is actually a very thrilling, date night appropriate activity. There wasn’t any popcorn served during the Budgetary Talks of March 2007 (although the children had some while enjoying a movie in the other room) but there was definitely laughter and the potential for some serious tears. Unlike other date nights, this one ended in prayer time. See how God redeems even the strangest of dates.

Maybe tomorrow night we can watch a movie and let the children work on finances.

Kathy

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P365 – Day 70 (Comfort Food)

What says comfort food to you?

Macaroni and Cheese
Chocolate cake with hot fudge sauce
Fried Chicken
Oatmeal
Chicken noodle soup
Cheeseburger and fries

In our house pancakes ranks up at the top of the list for cozy, settle in and watch a movie, sugary goodness, comfort food.

Warning – these pictures may shock and dismay!

david's pancakes

This boy can’t even wait to cut his food.

I found an article interviewing chefs and food writers on their favorite comfort foods. Their choices were a bit more elegant than our typical fare but sounded delicious. It was interesting to see how much food and family were interconnected.

We had fried eggs with our pancakes this evening. I was afraid the ravenous looks on the children’s faces would be too much for this sedate crowd so I didn’t take any pictures. I have to protect the gluttonous.

these are good!

No doubt he’s checking to see if there is room for more pancakes.

Since my change in eating the past few years, typical comfort foods are no longer part of my menu. When I have a bad day or the children (darling though they are) are testing my patience, chocolate and bowls of chips are not available to me as snack foods. I have to find other ways of dealing with my frustrations. It’s been rather eye-opening (and humbling / embarrassing) to see the patterns I have of turning to food in times of stress.

For the most part I am much happier to be off sugar and other ‘trigger’ foods, but occasionally I miss some of those good old comfort foods. Look at this face.

smiling boy

Nothing like white flour, white sugar, buttery goodness for dinner. Yum.

Tim reminded me of the words that Jesus spoke when he was hungry (and he was TRULY hungry after 40 days of fasting):

Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God. Matthew 4:4

Ah, the ultimate comfort food. During trying moments in life, when I feel overwhelmed and want to dive into the cookie jar, I do have something available to me that offers real solace, help, and peace – God’s Word. No calories or fat grams to worry about.

Kathy

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P365 – Day 69 (The Game of Life)

Today was dreary and grey. A perfect day for sleeping in. The children were little angels (quiet ones) and entertained themselves while Tim and I took advantage of a leisurely Saturday. Rachel was eager to get to the library, where books were being held for her, so she pulled me out of my weekend laziness (it was 11 am by this point) and hijacked a ride. After the library we went to the Y for some exercise. I did 10 minutes on three different elliptical machines, which reveals my strange need for variety. Actually my favorite machine was occupied and it took me a while to drive the riff raff off (those riff raff are everywhere). Rachel and I also tried out the stationary bikes.

Tim and the rest of the children came with the wallyball and set up the net for a friendly family game. I never did get to the weight machines – lost oomph by the time we played wallyball. Tim stayed and continued playing with Joshua and David while I took Daniel, Sarah and Rachel home to make lunch.

Tim was definitely the King of Games today. He played several rounds of Turn the Tide with the boys, Feed the Kitty with the younger set, and then started a game of Life before going to the Y. After wallyball and lunch, Tim and the two D’s picked up their game.

game of life

There are actually many Biblical lessons to be learned in The Game of Life (we have the new version).

1) You are required to get married – He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD. Proverbs 18:22
2) You are rewarded if you have children – Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him. Psalm 127:3
3) There are more rewards if you have more children – So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; Genesis 1:27-28a

The other lessons come with the dialogue that accompanies the game. Here are some of the things I overheard this afternoon:

Tim: It’s time to get married, make sure I find Kathy.
Tim: Daniel, are you getting married? Does she love God? Is she kind? Be careful when you pick a wife.
Tim: Okay little children (talking to his blue and pink pegs, riding in his Life car), I want to teach you about God.
Daniel: One of my children turned four and asked Jesus in his heart.
David: My children already know about God. They love Him.
Tim: You taught them about God?
David: Well, I taught them how to read and do math and all about God.
Tim: Do you read them the Bible?
David: Oh yes, every day we read the chapter. At night.

Who knew the Game of Life would provide the opportunity to obey the scriptures.

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Deuteronomy 6:6-7

praying for diet coke

In the middle of the game, Daniel asked for a sip of Tim’s diet Coke. Tim has a new rule regarding his precious soda – in order for the children to be granted sips, gulps, or tastes they have to pray for him. Right then and there. No exceptions. I thought it was a very sneaky idea. Tim is greedy that way. You can see, in the picture, that Daniel is just about to pray for Tim.

I need to try that angle with my coffee. Most of the time, with my healthy food choices, the kids aren’t exactly falling over themselves to have bites and tastes.

“What’s that Mom? Oh, steamed kale. Yum. No, thanks, I’ll pass. Daddy, can I have a spoonful of your Nutella?”

Sigh. It’s a good thing they don’t stop and offer me curses instead of prayers, right then and there.

Kathy

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P365 – Day 68 (Friends galore)

Thank you, Tim, for being a guest blogger here on the site. :) Come by anytime and write some more.

I am committed to getting to bed at a decent hour tonight. It’s already 10:30 pm so some might say I’m already behind. Those people probably got up before 8 am so we know what they are (hint, riff raff).

I had my camera with me today and actually remembered to take pictures. So often I’m focused and busy and don’t step out of the activity to photograph it.

Sarah is very blessed to have several young girls her age in her circle of homeschooling friends.

girls playingSarah and friends

Last week she and Rachel went over to a friend’s house for a sleepover. It’s such a treat that Sarah has special friends. One of the added joys of befriending a big family is that there are companions of all ages. Two of these playground girls have older sisters that are friends of Rachel’s. This week a pair of sisters came over to our house to play. Rachel went to see Little Women with the older sister and a youth leader from church. Sarah played dolls and dress up with the younger sister.

Joshua has also made some wonderful friends at our homeschooling co-op. They have done birthdays and sleepovers and all sorts of get togethers.

Joshua's buddies

Lunch hour at the co-op is when the moms are able to sit down and visit. Yes, there are interruptions from little (and big) ones constantly, but there is also opportunity for lively discussion. Healthy eating and the difficulties and challenges of feeding a large family is often the topic of our conversation, hence the orange.

Jen's orange

Thanks for taking this picture, Holly! We should have taken one more with you in it.

I didn’t get pictures of David and Daniel today. One of Daniel’s favorite things to do is play with little Isaac (younger brother of Rachel and Sarah’s sister friends). He is wonderful with the little Isaac and follows (chases) him all over the lunch room. David usually manages to find some friend to wrestle.

My problem is feeding them enough lunch to cover them for the day AND all the running around they do while eating lunch. I think they burn the calories faster than they take them in.

ring around the rosy

Friends are so important and I am very thankful for the people God has brought into our lives.

Kathy

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tn_David_Silly_Glasses_Phone

P365 – Day 67 (Chips Ahoy)

It may come as a shock, but this is Tim writing, not Kathy. With the onslaught of Project 365, I have become a stranger to my own blog, nearly forgotten in the memories of my faithful readership (both of them). Not surprisingly, the number of people reading the blog has doubled since Kathy started writing in earnest … I’ll try not to read too much into that statistic. All this is just to say that those rumors about my demotion from ‘Contributor’ (one who posts blog entries) to ‘Subscriber’ (one who can only post comments) are false (or at least mostly so).


Not long after the new year dawned, Kathy and I had an opportunity to attend the Jefferson Baptist Church Prayer Conference. This blog entry is not about that conference, however many times Kathy and I have promised to write something about it.

One outgrowth of the conference, however, was a renewed interest in writing down goals for ourselves. As it was repeated many times during the conference, “a goal that is not written down is not a goal.” We were encouraged to come up with goals in all the areas that mattered to us — spiritual goals, relational goals, financial goals, personal development goals, the list goes on and on. This blog entry is not really about those goals, either.

Most people will, by this time, have lost patience with this tiresome litany of ‘what this blog is NOT’, so I ought to include a gratuitous picture, to satisfy the masses.

David talking on the phone with Dad's glasses
This picture of David talking on my cellphone while wearing my glasses has nothing to do with this blog.

The conference speaker was asked by one of his congregants, “Do you play computer games?”, to which he answered, “Yes.” “How much time do you allow yourself to play?” She probed. “Half an hour a month,” he confided. He spoke at some length about his desire to use his time wisely and his recognition that computer games were a good way to be sucked into losing a lot of time that could be spent better in other pursuits. He likes playing some of the solitaire-style games, and so, once a month, he indulges. In retrospect, I probably should have skipped that session.

Sarah finds new and interesting uses for the chips

Are these math manipulatives?

On the way home from the conference, we thought about our parenting and the example that we (OK, mostly I) set in terms of leisure. I was convicted about the amount of time I allow my children to spend playing computer games, when they should, perhaps, be learning or playing interactively or serving others. While we don’t play that much during the week, some weekends have been dominated by computer gaming, especially during the dreary winter months here in Washington. We have noticed that when too much time is spent playing computer games, tempers grow short and a general spirit of churlish dissatisfaction descends upon the household.

kathy and the chips
Here’s the Grand High Keeper of the Chips, herself.

I also became convicted about the amount of time that I spend playing computer games. A word of warning: if you allow the Holy Spirit to convict you in one area, don’t be surprised if that spills over to another area. Truth be told, Jesus is not satisfied with anything less than all of our heart — He’s greedy that way. :)

Kathy and I talked and prayed about it, and we came up with a strange scheme. Truth be told, the idea came up thanks to our love for the online casino games we play on verajohn.se during our free time. Each Wednesday, the participants in the computer-game-rationing plan receive several poker chips. Each chip represents a period of time, such that blue chips are one hour, green chips are two hours, and white chips (formerly red) are a half-hour. Initially we started with an allotment of four hours a week, but this was soon reduced to a scant three and a half hours a week. When anyone wants to spend a chip, they must announce it, hand over the appropriate chip to Kathy, grab a timer (we have several) and carefully monitor the time they spend.

Rachel the chip miser
Rachel the chip miser

One initial hurdle we needed to overcome was the fact that we didn’t actually have any poker chips. We’d been eyeing the ones at https://sixofthebest.co/best-poker-chips-set/ for some time now. We play a lot of cards, but we don’t gamble. There is a long story behind that, but it doesn’t figure prominently here, so I’ll skip it. We zipped over to the store and found a set of 50 blue clay poker chips, very satisfying in their weight and quality. Everyone enjoys clinking them together (the sound of a dropped chip rivets the attention of all). Sarah was at first very distraught that she was excluded from the rationing plan (she really doesn’t play any non-educational computer games). She was consoled by the promise that she could play with my chips any time she wanted, and the first week of rationing was launched.

Sarah rifles through my chip stash

“Whatever you do, Sarah, don’t drop Daddy’s chips!”

As it turns out, I am used to playing quite a bit more than 210 minutes of computer games in a week. (Thirty minutes of Pirates goes by astonishingly fast.) Three and a half hours sounds like a large number … I’m pretty sure I don’t want to divulge how much I played before we started rationing. Let me say that when I am busy, days and even weeks can go by without much intensive play, but when I am idle, I can put in two or three hours some evenings, and more than that on a Saturday.

One interesting outgrowth of the plan has been the ‘chip economy’ that has developed. When a person is low on chips, they can sometimes earn more by taking on extra chores or behaving in an exceptionally good way. It is astounding how cheerful some of us are about extra work around the house, now that this reward is available. There has also been a lot more collective watching — rather than spend a chip, some children find it entertaining to watch a sibling spend one. Joshua, Rachel and David are chip-misers (in varying degrees), while Daniel and I are chip-spenders. As of this writing, Joshua has nearly 20 hours saved up (he really hates being chip-poor) while Daniel and I have less than 5 hours (and only that because yesterday was ‘payday’). Last weekend Rachel paid David a half-hour chip to clean her room; both went away very satisfied with the transaction.

Daniel counts his chips often

Daniel keeps careful track of his chips and knows EXACTLY how many he has at all times.

I find myself kicking my heels aimlessly in the evenings, some times, with a number of positive results. I’m more responsive to my younger two kids, and I’m more likely to help clean up the kitchen or talk to Kathy. I am playing many more board games than I used to, and I am enjoying some good books. I find that I am much more likely to spend time on Saturdays preparing for the Sunday School class I teach, and the time ‘lost’ working with the 5th and 6th graders on Wednesday evenings is not quite as painful as it used to be. Many nights I even go to bed earlier (a huge boon during allergy season).

The chips, in all their glory.
No, we haven’t moved to Vegas.

Because of chip-hoarding, we had to buy some additional chips to round out the initial lot of 50 one-hour chips. First we found some cheap red, white and blue plastic ones, and we adopted the red chips as half-hour chips. Sadly, these were so different in shape and quality that they suffered the same fate which befell several one-dollar coins (e.g. the Susan B. Anthony dollar and the Sacagawea dollar), here in the USA. Yesterday I was browsing in the dollar store, and found a cheap set of plastic chips which (although they don’t clink like the original blue ones) were at least the same shape and size. We adopted the green and white chips from that set, and the chip-famine of 2007 was averted. (Prior to this, an ugly threat was circulating, to the effect that existing chip hoards might be ‘nationalized’. This caused some speculators to panic, with devastating results on the chip economy. Happily, wiser heads prevailed in the Fed, and an equitable and stable monetary policy was re-established.)

The Silas Marner of chips
Joshua, the Silas Marner of chips.

I can’t tell you where this will end … Kathy keeps threatening to further tighten the chip supply, perhaps down to three hours a week or even less. As much as it pains me to say it, I am glad that we have adopted this discipline, if only because it sets a good example of self-discipline to my children in an area where Kathy and I are both lacking. Daniel watches me like a hawk, and all the children are careful to squeal on me if I play ‘just a few seconds’ beyond my timer. In a twisted way, it has substantially heightened my enjoyment of the time I play computer games — I am careful to squeeze my money’s worth out of each half-hour chip.

I am reminded of the parable of the rich fool, as related in Luke 12, which I think relates to this topic:

Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.”

Jesus replied, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” Then he said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.”

And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man produced a good crop. He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’ “Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of good things laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.” ‘

“But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’

“This is how it will be with anyone who stores up things for himself but is not rich toward God.”

In thinking of how I want to be a good steward of the time that God has given me, I need to think in terms of building with gold, silver and precious stones, rather than with straw, hay and wood. I have no idea how much time I have left, and I want my time to count for something more eternal than my personal comfort or entertainment.

Or at least all but 3.5 hours a week. :)

Tim

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